Kyle Orton: The Man, The Myth, The Legend

Ladies- Bat Down The Hatches! Lock up your hard liquor, and your heart!

Kyle Orton: Chicago Bears backup quarterback, Hero among men women and children, social alcoholic; emerges again in a sloppy and innaproriate blaze of GLORY!

Deadspin has chronicled the life and times of the loveable Bear- his trademark neckbeard and propensity for shennanighans. Bears fan's across the country breathed a heavy sigh of relief after Kyle's contract was extended until the end of the 2009 season; and again after this 2008 Draft, when Chicago neglected to select any future QB that would stand in the way of Orton's run to the Hall of Fame!

Now Orton has not only had a very realistic perspective on this year's Internet frenzy that propelled him into fame:

"It doesn't bother me. I pick and choose times to have fun. I don't do it when it will affect my job. That's my personality, I go out and have fun. If someone puts it on the Internet, so be it. It doesn't affect me or bother my family."

But bless his heart- the 4 year NFL veteran out of Purdue is still pursuing glory on the field as well

"I'm sure you [reporters] all know it has been difficult for me and sometimes I handle it better maybe than other times. But that stuff is in the past and I think I've got a great opportunity here for the future and would love to make the best out of it and have a nice, long career here in Chicago," Orton said.

And to top that off, weeks before this latest photo op was added; Kyle was promoting enviornmentalism in addition to his long standing committment to chirrosis awareness. Apparently someone actually thought Kyle Orton was not only a good role model, but it was a good idea to bring him to an elementary school and interact with children.

We wait with baited breath as Kyle continues his legend of being an inspiration to America's youth as well as his ability to sneak a bottle of Jack Daniel's onto the football field in his greasy neckbeard. You have out Hearts Kyle.